N-I-N-E weeks.....

I can't believe I've been doing this for 9 weeks now.  And to be perfectly honest, if I hadn't publicly outed myself 8 weeks ago odds are very good that I would NOT be doing this anymore. My new running shoes would be buried in my shoe basket, my evenings would be spent reading or watching TV, my body would be bigger, my legs would be weaker, and I would be enjoying an all access back stage pass to every dessert table I come across (and let's face it...holiday season is here.  Bring on the dessert tables! Oi!).  But instead, despite the fact that I *really* didn't want to, I went running tonight.  Week 9.  Run for 30 minutes straight.  No breaks.  And I DID IT!  I have discovered that the first 5 minutes and last 3 minutes of a run are my most challenging.  The first 5 is my body warming up to the pace, the jiggling, the muscle aching burn....the last 3 are spent in anticipation and agony while each step gets me closer and closer to the last.  I haven't really hit the elusive "runners high" that so many of my fellow running friends speak of.  Instead I just get numb....except that I still feel my backside jiggle.  So the point is that the only reason I am still doing this is because I told you about it.    This was simultaniously the wisest and most foolish thing I could have done.  Turns out that accountability is a 2 edged sword.  Who knew?  What I do know is that I'm not running because it's fun.  I'm not running because it is therapy for me.  I'm not running because I had a piece of left-over Pumpkin Pie for lunch (okay, maybe that's not 100% true).  I'm not even running because of the health benefits.  At this moment in time, the only reason I am still running is because I publicly committed myself to it and I am too embarrassed NOT to run.  So while that might not be the BEST reason to run, today it is THE ONLY reason I ran.  And its working.  After 9 weeks, I'm still doing it.  I guess that's something.  Today, that something equaled a 40 minute 3.1 mile run on a treadmill.  Not too shabby.  When I talked about this with my uber-amazing and oh-so-insightful (sometimes) husband he passed on this little gem: When he was training for the Olympic Fencing Team (yeah, I know....freakin' amazing!) his coach told him that there is a cycle to becoming an athlete.  First you try something new.  You like it.  You do it some more.  And eventually you DON'T like it.  For most people, this is where they stop.  They don't bother to push through it.  Those that DO push through it are rewarded because eventually they not only LIKE it again, but it becomes 2nd nature to them.  Like breathing.  It just IS.  I figure that right now I am in my "I hate this and want to stop" stage.  But I'm not going to stop.  I'm going to keep doing this.  It will become 2nd nature to me.  I doubt it will ever be as easy as breathing for me, but....I can say that running for 3 minutes without stopping *IS* pretty easy for me now.  I don't even think about it (unless it's the last 3 minutes).  I just DO it. I have to believe that eventually running for 30 minutes will be like that as well.  I've just gotta give it time.